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绿底为优美，黄底为瑕疵，红底为错字（括号里边为间批），中间横线为删除，^{上标符号添加字}，文下隔行写点评，点评内容用红字，红双线“‖”处段另起（分段）.

 

Dear Editor

发布时间：2015-05-05 15:52:12 作者：白钰  发布者：bailongmei 浏览次数：3639  类别：英文作文  

作文要求：同学们，我们身边有很多助人为乐的同学，他们的事例值得我们学习。请根据下面表格信息给学校英文报写一篇短文，谈谈身边的好人好事，号召大家向他们学习。

Who they are	What they usually do to help others
Liu Na	make our school beautiful
Zhang Hua	Help other students with their studies
Wu Tong	Help the people in trouble
……	…….

 

Dear Editor,

   In our school,some students are always thinking more of others and are ready to help them. I’m moved deeply. Here is what they usually do.

  Liu Na is a very good student.She is tall and  thin She’s  very beatifull . she makes with their in trouble studies,He is very friendly ,we all like he. Wu Tong  He is an handsome boy. He with a big smile on his face and get a glasses everyday,He is an kind hearted people.

  I hope everyone can lean from thon and do something for others.

 

• 批改教师：王思捷 ( 作文批改网 )
  批改时间：2015/5/6 21:28:46
  点评指数：
  点评内容：
  

  
  

  
  

  作文要求：同学们，我们身边有很多助人为乐的同学，他们的事例值得我们学习。请根据下面表格信息给学校英文报写一篇短文，谈谈身边的好人好事，号召大家向他们学习。

  Who they are	What they usually do to help others
  Liu Na	make our school beautiful
  Zhang Hua	Help other students with their studies
  Wu Tong	Help the people in trouble
  ……	…….

  
  

  Dear Editor,

  In our school,some students are always thinking (always是一般现在时态的标志) more of others (more than themselves，固定搭配，“替他人着想”) and are ready to help them. I’m moved deeply. Here is what they usually do.

  Liu Na is a very good student.She is tall and  thin She’s  very beatifull（这两句话是介绍刘娜外貌的，与“她日常做的事”关系不大）.she makes with their in trouble studies（这句话句法不通）He (She) is very friendly ,we all like he (her，动词后接代词宾格). Wu Tong  He is an handsome (元音音素前不定冠词用an)boy. He with (has) a big smile on his face and get a glasses everyday （也是介绍吴桐的性格特点，和他平日乐于助人有关系，但关系不大）,He is an kind hearted people.

  I hope everyone can lean from thon and do something for others (from them，向他们学习).

  要与材料扣得紧密些。