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Selfishness
发布时间:2012-12-18 20:18:47 作者:于玲玲  发布者:201002 浏览次数:2952  类别:英文作文  
[大学三年级] 河南省 >> 周口市 >> 川汇区


  I major in English,so linguistics is my compulsory course. And I have a reference about it.Because of many students not having it,sometimes they borrow it from me.However,today,I could not find it.I remembered I have put it on the desk.I have thought maybe one of them took it without telling me.So I asked my classmates whether they took my reference.The result was that nobody concern about me. Though they did not say it was none of their business, their expression betrayed them.They did not listen to what I have said.They still laughed,talked and played.Just like I was invisible.I was said not because of not finding my book but because of the expression of the selfish person.
  "A good friend in did is a good friend in need." Good friends are not selfish.So I want to say something to them embracing the character of selfishness.Firstly, I want to say you are not my real friend and cannot hold my respect.I contempt you because your appearances are not accordant with your behaviors. Secondly,I want to say that you do not need to have any expectation that I can offer help to you when you are in trouble.I am not cruel,but I must let you know the result of selfishness.
  People cannot live without other helps.If you do others a fever,you will get the same help.So do not become a miser and selfish person.
教师点评:
  • 批改教师:王思捷 ( 作文批改网 )
    批改时间:2013/1/6 15:35:45
    点评指数:
    点评内容:
      I major in English,so linguistics is my compulsory course. And I have a reference about用on,about只是泛泛地有关,on,特指专著,用on比较好)it.Because of many students not having it,(只要学英语专业,大三一定有语言学概论的,全国学英语专业的学生不少)sometimes they borrow it from me.However,today,I could not find it.I remembered I have put it on the desk.I have thought maybe one of them took it without telling me.So I asked my classmates whether they took my reference book or not(whether从句完整更好).The result was that nobody concern前后时态一致)about me. Though they did not say it was none of their business, their expression betrayed them.They did not listen tolisten to表示动作,hear表示结果)what I have said.They still laughed,talked and played.Just like I was invisible.I was said not because of not finding my book but because of the expression of the selfish person.
      "A good friend in didneed)is a good friend in need.(indeed)" Good friends are not selfish.So I want to say something to them (前面加逗号,这是伴随状语)embracing the character词语意思与后文所说不搭)of selfishness.Firstly, I want to say you are not my real friend and cannot hold my respect.I contempt you because your appearances are not accordant with your behaviors. Secondly,I want to say that you do not need to have any expectation that I can offer help to you when you are in trouble.I am not cruel,but I must let you know the result of selfishness.
      People cannot live without other注意所有格,是“别人的”)helps.If you do others a fever,you will get the same help.So do not become a miser and selfish person.
    点评:写出此等文章竟然还说自己是学英语的......
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